If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur.

Doug Larson


England and America are two countries separated by a common language.

George Bernard Shaw


The English language was carefully, carefully cobbled together by three blind dudes and a German dictionary.

Dave Kellett


Even if you do learn to speak correct English, whom are you going to speak it to?

Clarence Darrow


The English have no respect for their language, and will not teach their children to speak it.

George Bernard Shaw


Every English poet should master the rules of grammar before he attempts to bend or break them.

Robert Graves


Here will be an old abusing of God's patience and the king's English.

William Shakespeare